The holiday week came and went and after one more party to ring in the New Year, I think we're just about toasted. A week full of good things, albeit it busy and expensive and generally full. We're so lucky that both families are close and we have friends here we've had for decades, but it makes for a very social season. There is a Rainer Maria Rilke quote that continues to pop into my head when I think about loving Hugh well. “I hold this to be the highest task of a bond between two people: that each should stand guard over the solitude of the other.” He is an introvert, one who recharges by being alone, depleted by too many parties and get-togethers and I want to nurture this need while it may not be one that functions the same way in me. Our home, because we work here often as well, doesn't exactly feel the sanctuary it may for most people who return there after a day away at work. So we've gone to the sea the past few early evenings, just the two of us, to take a breath and get out. I can see Hugh's spirit lighten there, something I will try my entire life to give to him, by way of trips to the sea or otherwise. What a huge responsibility we have to love people - to not just show up, but to be present and aware of someone else. I'm not just speaking of marriage, but the truth of it welled up in me as I thought back on the whirlwind of a week. As my sister beyond spoiled our family for Christmas with her phenomenal taste and generous gift giving skills, or how we all drove 4 hours round trip on Christmas day, ate lunch a la gas station mini mart, to spend one hour with my grandma who wasn't feeling well, that a few people gave gifts to our baby boy in my tum who is merely the size of a large heirloom tomato (so I'm told, though he seems to be taking up a lot more real estate), and that his dad was able to feel him kick (or high five as he's claiming it to be) for the first time on Christmas morning and told every person he saw that day about it. We give gifts and time and words and hugs and infrequently stop to feel how truly huge it is, really. What you give, how you give it and to whom. I hope to be more thoughtful about this in 2014.

These feelings of the giganticness of life are on par for the year's end. This evening we'll go to our ritual new years spot and talk goals, likely shed tears relating to how we fit into said giganticness and admit how in even looking forward to a new year, I may be seized with impotent fear. The small things within the big things are what this beautiful life is built out of and I hope to see and experience the minutia of the day to day when the big things feel like too much.

My friend Megan of A Sweet Spoonful has a charming cookbook that came out today and these muffins are from it's pages. It's a breakfast cookbook but so much more than that as you'll see when you get drawn into her storytelling and impeccable granola recipe that truly extends beyond breakfast to one of my favorite ice cream toppings. I chose these muffins due to the pears I had in perfect condition to be grated, but the book is filled with a variety of breakfast ideas. I appreciate how these recipes seem to have come so naturally from her life onto the printed pages of a cookbook. Congrats, Megan, I'm excited to try more recipes!

Anything can happen, anything can be. - Shel Silverstein

The loveliest new year to you all.

PEAR AND HAZELNUT MUFFINS // Makes 12 standard muffins

Recipe barely adapted from Megan Gordons Whole Grain Mornings

I halved the recipe with success, hence why you see six muffins in the photos. I do believe these could be made gluten free with a quick swap of the flours, you just won't get as much of a dome. I'd go equal parts almond, oat flour, brown rice flour to equal the 1 1/2 cups and just expect they'll be more crumbly, but this doesn't bother me. Maybe throw a splash of flax meal in there too for binding support and make up for the fact that these flours aren't quite as absorbent as wheat. Can you tell I'm big on precise baking? I also think the whole thing could work great in a loaf pan with a longer baking time.

3/4 cup rolled oats
1 cup unbleached all purpose
1/2 cup whole wheat pastry flour
1/4 tsp. baking soda
2 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp. ground cardamom
1/2 tsp. ground nutmeg
1/2 tsp. ground cinnamon
3/4 tsp. kosher salt
2-3 firm pears
2/3 cup natural cane sugar or muscavado
6 Tbsp. unsalted butter
1 cup buttermilk
2 eggs, beaten
1 1/2 tsp. vanilla extract
1 heaping cup toasted and chopped hazelnuts

Preheat the oven to 425'. Butter a standard 12-cup miffin tin (or line with papers. I wish I'd done the former).

In a bowl, combine the oats, flours, baking soda, baking powder, cardamom, nutmeg, cinnamon and salt. Mix well and set aside.

Core the pears and grate them into a bowl using the large holes of a box grater. You should have a heaping cup of shredded pear.

Put the sugar in a large bowl. Melt the butter and stir it into the sugar until well combined. Whisk in the buttermilk, eggs, vanilla and shredded pear until you have what resembles a loose batter. Add the flour mixture and fold it in gently, being careful not to overmix. Reserve 1/2 cup of the hazelnuts but stir the other half into the batter.

Fill the muffin cups nearly to the top and sprinkle the remaining hazelnuts. Put the muffins in the oven and immediately decrease the heat to 375'. Bake until the tops are golden brown and feel firm to the touch, 25-27 minutes.

Let the muffins cool for 10 minutes before removing them from the tin. Serve warm or room temperature. They will keep for 2-3 days in an airtight container.

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Breakfast, Entrée, Fall, Winter, Gluten Free

SLOW-COOKED KALE OMELETTES

Sara Forte · December 13, 2013

My parents have lived in the same house for 28 years. I have spent nearly every Christmas morning in that living room. I recall being deterred from peeking over the stairs when my sister and I woke up as to not see the gifts that Santa didn't wrap. One year there was a foam-top surfboard and another a swivel desk chair. Yes, I always peeked. I had to! My mom would start the heater, coffee, and holiday tunes, and get the camera ready so my sister and I could prance downstairs in our coordinating pajama sets. I still can't keep track of the names of people I have worked with for three years, but I have vivid, sweet memories of Christmas with my family. Selective, I suppose.

Last year I made cinnamon rolls for the family and they turned out great - tender, extra pecan filling, cream cheese glaze - I'd declared them a new tradition. I don't get baking right most times, but the stars had aligned just long enough for that breakfast treat. This year there is request for waffles and eggs, which would make that cinnamon roll "tradition" short lived. The eggs, despite the pastry decision, need to be something besides the ordinary. I came across this kale recipe with suspicion as I generally prefer my vegetables on the raw or al dente side. Cooking the greens for 30 minutes?!? That sounds so... brown. But Suzanne Goin has an impressive handful of very successful restaurants and cookbooks so it's likely not prudent to question the recipe against the basis of my raw kale salad habit. You just follow the directions and realize doing things someone else's way is often times the fresh perspective you needed. I may have heightened senses at the moment, but sizzling rosemary, garlic and onions have never smelled so incredible. I could have stood over the pan and finished it, just myself, the fork and that glorious kale. I saved a handful for omelette filling and I believe it will be the perfect thing to dress up holiday morning eggs. Even on its own as a side this would be great, and I would assume it's enough for four if they aren't quite as greedy with their greens.

Wishing you and yours a sweet holiday.

SLOW-COOKED KALE OMELETTES / Makes 4

Kale recipe adapted from Suzanna Goin via Bon Appetit and likely in her latest a.o.c cookbook

I use a 10'' non-stick for a one-person omelette. I think you could make a frittata in a 12'' if you weren't up for making individual omelettes. You want a really hearty sized bunch of kale as it shrinks down significantly after the blanch. Too little and you'll only wish you had more, too much and there won't be enough room in the pan for it to fully crisp up on the edges. You'll want to weigh the bundle to get this just right and use your largest pan either way.

1 heaping pound kale, ribs removed
1/4 cup extra virgin olive oil
2 sprigs rosemary
1/2 teaspoon sea salt, or more to taste
1 dried chile de arbol, broken into pieces OR 1/2 teaspoon red chile flakes
1 cup sliced yellow onion (about half a whole onion)
2 large garlic cloves, thinly sliced
2 Tbsp. ghee (or more olive oil)
fresh ground pepper
8 extra-large eggs
1/4 cup whole milk
6 ounces soft goat cheese

Bring a large pot of salted water to a boil. Blanch the kale for 1 1/2 minutes, drain, let it cool, and squeeze out excess water. Chop it up and set aside.

In a large skillet, warm the olive oil over medium heat. Add the rosemary sprigs and chile and cook for one minute. Reduce the heat to low, add the onion and salt, cook for two minutes, and then add in the garlic slices and stir. Cook for about 8 minutes until the onions are soft and starting to brown.

Turn the heat to medium-low, add the kale and ghee or oil, stir to coat. Cook for 25-30 minutes, stirring occasionally until the kale is almost black and charred at the edges. Remove the rosemary sprigs and chile de arbol, if using. Pepper flakes stay. Sprinkle some fresh ground pepper, taste for salt, and set aside.

Heat a 10'' pan over medium-low heat with a small pat of butter or ghee at the bottom. For each omelette, beat 2 extra-large eggs with a Tbsp. of milk. Add the eggs to the pan and let them cook for about a minute and a half. Use a spatula to lift up one corner of the eggs, tilt the pan, and let the liquid egg on top, run underneath. When the top is still soft but the omelette mostly set, put a few spoonfuls of the kale down the center and a generous sprinkle of goat cheese on top. Gently fold the omelette into thirds, like an envelope, and slide it onto a plate. Repeat with remaining omelettes.

* For the frittata, preheat the oven to 425'. Warm the kale in a 12'' skillet over low heat. Whisk the eggs and milk in a bowl and pour them on top of the kale. Cook on the stove for about 4 minutes. Crumble the cheese on top and finish it in the oven for another 6-10 minutes until you shake the pan (careful, hot handle) and the center looks just a tad jiggly. It will set as it cools.

Serve with a handful of fresh greens on top and some crusty toast.

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Appetizer, Side, Salad, Fall, Entrée, Gluten Free, Personal

AUTUMN SALAD WITH HORSERADISH VINAIGRETTE + NEWS!

Sara Forte · November 14, 2013

Autumn Salad with Horseradish Vinaigrette . Sprouted Kitchen

I'm pregnant! We're pregnant is what you say, I suppose, but I'm the one in the stretchy pants over here. So many things to say about this, friends, but I'm at a loss for words at the same time. This may be more of a generally-emotional-lady thing, so bear with me, but you know when you feel outside of yourself? Like little crazy trolls are frantic in your head making you irritable and easily bringing you to tears. Sometimes the trolls rest, but I generally feel a little... off. I have another human in my belly and trolls in my mind and I'm in absolute amazement that our bodies make people. I still can't believe it.

I have wanted to be a mom my entire life. I have never once doubted it. I was a big sister, and I mothered my little sister the moment she came home from the hospital. I covered her whole body in diaper cream and bossed her around. I mothered my own mother, too, from time to time. I would ask if she had her purse when we left the house and remind her to get gas when the dash light went. I enjoy taking care of people, I am a nurturer, I ask questions and listen for the answer, I love a really good, meaningful hug and a good cuddle. All I know is that this baby in my tum? I have desired him/her for as long as I can remember.

I'm so excited to be doing this with Hugh. He will be so good at being a dad. That is one of the things I am most excited to watch. I'm aware we're both imperfect people, figuring things out as we go, and I'm ok raising a family without having everything together. That's something I hope our child sees in us early on - that you do the best you can to love people well. You give and listen and compromise and work hard and stay present and use good manners and be honest and soak up the worlds' beauty, but remain aware that we're fallen people just doing our best, and you are completely loved anyway. I am so freaking excited to love this person. I tear up when I think of meeting you, baby. Every time. Do you feel me rub my belly when I get up to go to the bathroom 100x through the night? I just want you to know I'm thinking of you. I giggle to myself that there will now be another person to observe our quirkyness. I hope we don't completely embarrass it, even though that sounds inevitable if I remember my teen years correctly. Hugh and I are silly and laugh a lot and we're a little bit weird, but we have the greatest time. Gah! I am so excited this little person will be joining the silly. We've been waiting for people to join our home office dance party. It's only a matter of time now, baby.

So here we are. A precious baby coming end of May. Thank you for your patience while things have been a bit slow around here. I am not getting much cooking done, unfortunately. I am currently in a bean and cheese burrito phase. This is only after we've passed through cold cereal (there are so many types!), french fries, a fruit-heavy week, and a very short (gasp) cheeseburger stint. I feel a little outside myself and somehow wonderfully confident that we are as ready as we can be for this. With full hearts... Sara, Hugh and the nugget.

P.S.

It needs to be said that getting pregnant was not easy for us. It took longer than we expected. We had some tests done, and we were told that we wouldn't be able to conceive on our own without alternative methods... which turned out not to be the case, thankfully. That season weighed heavy on my heart - something I wanted to talk about here but it didn't feel quite right. My heart is so tender for the woman who desires a child and is having a tough time getting pregnant. One month or two years of hoping, waiting and being disappointed, only to run the cycle again - not enough people talk about how that feels. Lady, huge hugs to you. You feel defeated, like your body is failing you, that it is SO EASY for everyone else. It doesn't feel any better when people tell you, "It will happen when it's supposed to happen," that just makes you feel more frustrated and want to punch them in the face. I may be on the other side for now, but I wanted to express some empathy for this group because it's a dark place to be and it feels super lonely. My suggestion to you is to find people - even when it seems easy for everyone else, I guarantee you there is someone else having a tough time or another woman who has a story. Talk about it, find a confidant, it will help keep your head above water.

AUTUMN SALAD WITH HORSERADISH VINAIGRETTE // Serves 6

This is a deconstruction for my sister. She had a similar salad at True Food Kitchen(side note, they have a gorgeous cookbook) and asked me to replicate it so she could bring it to Thanksgiving. The original had dried mulberries in it, and I think you could sub in cranberries or cherries, but I skipped this. I would consider the amount here a moderate addition of horseradish in the dressing. If you like a kick, want a more forward flavor, add more. There is no dairy in this salad as written, but next time, I'll be adding a generous sprinkling of parmesan on top and a dollop of creme fraiche to the dressing. 'Tis the season :)

3/4 lb. brussel sprouts
3/4 lb. cauliflower florets
3 cups butternut squash, in 1/2'' cubes
2 Tbsp. extra virgin olive oil
1 Tbsp. white balsamic
3/4-1 tsp. sea salt
1 tsp. fresh ground pepper
1/2 tsp. ground nutmeg
few pinches of cayenne
1 cup cooked white beans (great northern, cannellini etc.), rinsed and drained
1/2 cup pomegranate seeds
2 packed cups arugula
1 Tbsp. prepared horseradish
1 large clove garlic
1/2 a shallot
1 tsp. honey
2 Tbsp. white wine vinegar
1/4 cup extra virgin olive oil
1/2 tsp. each sea salt and pepper, to taste
handful of fresh chives and/or parsley
dollop of creme fraiche, optional

Preheat the oven to 400'. Cut the brussels in half length wise, and cut the cauliflower into similar size chunks. Add both of these and the squash to a large rimmed baking tray. Drizzle the vegetables with the olive oil, balsamic, salt, pepper, nutmeg and few pinches of cayenne and toss everything together with your hands to coat. Roast in the upper third of the oven for 35 minutes until edges are browned.

While the vegetables roast, make your dressing. In a mini blender or processor, combine the horseradish, garlic, shallot, honey, white wine vinegar, olive oil, salt and pepper, herbs and creme fraiche, if using. Blend everything together to mix well. taste for salt and pepper and set aside.

As soon as the hot tray is out of the oven, add the beans onto the tray and toss everything together. Allow the vegetables to cool to room temperature. Add the pom seeds, arugula and a good drizzle or the dressing and toss everything to coat. Sprinkle with a little parmesan if you please.

This salad is served at room temperature, could be served cold as well if you chill the roasted vegetables.

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